What is assertiveness?
Whether you like a raise, a promotion, just to see a positive change in your life or anything you want to accomplish, you need to build an essential skill called assertiveness. Being assertive means having the power to confidently communicate what you like and express your thoughts flamboyantly, no matter whatsoever.
Assertiveness is an interpersonal skill - a behaviour used to effectively communicate and have an interaction with somebody without any hesitation. Being assertive is holding the spirit of righteousness and taking the right decision in most situations. To be precise, assertiveness is nothing but a thin line between an aggressive style and a sublime style.
Key Benefits of Assertiveness
The ability to express your thoughts and actions confidently is a crucial life skill for your personal and business life. The advantages of being assertive include:
Building self-confidence
The best confidence builder is developing the power to face your fear. The more you develop comfortability around your circle, the more you feel worthy about your behaviour.
Assertiveness—a fundamental leadership trait
In business, leaders have to be upfront, direct and ready to delegate tasks effectively to manage people and run a corporation. In your business life, the power of being assertive is fundamental for a leadership role as well as for running a successful organisation.
Assertive people are less stressed. Unresolved issues that you’re afraid of will linger and create stress in your mind. This prolonged resistance to facing your fears baffles your psychological state and well-being.
The power to handle stress in crucial times is an excellent testament to assertiveness as it builds conviction and confidence.
Assertiveness—an impacting communication style
The power to communicate what you like or don’t like lets people know where you stand on a specific issue. It's a technique that builds open and honest relationships.
Being assertive helps you taste the essence of victory in achieving your destination. Being quiet and feeling shy leads to pessimistic behaviour. Assertive communication is fundamental to accomplishing your destined personal goals.
Techniques to Build Assertiveness
Some ways to build assertiveness are as follows:
- Practice
Practice is a key to any accomplishment. An individual becomes an expert in a domain only through practice and self-confidence. Most people tend to underestimate the habit of practice and bluntly believe that learning is superior to practice. This is absolutely a hoax. If you want to be an assertive person, you ought to focus on practising rather than merely learning skills.
- Use ‘I’ statements
‘I’ statement is an assertive statement; it displays an attitude of confidence and solemnity in the behaviour as well as in character.
- Focus on specific behaviour instead of making it personal
If you’re unhappy, you have to deal without getting too personal. To be assertive, one must concentrate intensely on building themselves and ignore other people’s possessions and laurels.
- Say ‘No’ but in a polite way
If you don’t like anything that is insisted upon you, saying ‘no’ to that is not a bad thing. On the contrary, it is very pivotal to showcase your feelings.
But it doesn’t need to be arrogant. You can convey what you feel and be polite and subtle at the same time.
- Have one consistent message
If you’re handling someone manipulative who’s preying on your guilt or being an imbecile, repeat your message clearly that you are stronger and never fall prey to their manipulation.
- Don’t be apologetic
It is common to make mistakes, but it doesn’t mean you have to say sorry for everything. You need to understand the fundamental fact that making mistakes is the only way of gaining knowledge and experience in your life.
It’s okay to make mistakes, but you have to make sure that you also learn.
- Look confident
Good posture and eye contact assist you to appear more assertive. Make your facial expressions neutral or positive. Don’t expose yourself to the fullest.
- Speak calmly
Assertiveness isn’t equivalent to haughtiness. You can simultaneously be bold and crisp in explaining your thoughts. When you are afraid to speak, inhale slowly and keep your voice away from stuttering. If you’re feeling emotional, wait for a minute, relax and continue your conversation.
- Empathy
Consider the emotions and opinions of others. Empathy is a fundamental trait to be successful for every business. Friendly people and prolific leaders exhibit a good sense of empathy for their folks and colleagues.
- Explore other solutions or compromises
Compromise is necessary even when you’re assertive. Be willing to figure out what mistake you have on your side and develop the habit of introspection. This trait helps you understand yourself better and brings clarity to your life.
- Be brave
You can’t always be afraid to face your opposition; you need to speak up for yourself; therefore, you need to approach each situation courageously.
Facts about Assertiveness
- An assertive personality is a person who could show their needs, thoughts, and feelings in a direct and honest way while respecting other people.
- Assertiveness therapy is a behavioral therapy kind that helps people enhance their interpersonal skills and self-confidence.
- The types of assertiveness include passive assertiveness, aggressive assertiveness, and non-assertiveness.
- An assertive person is always looking for a solution to the problem. This means an assertive person actively seeks solutions to problems rather than complaining or avoiding them to find a resolution that works for everyone involved.
How to be Assertive at work?
There are many ways through which you can be assertive. Here are those techniques:
- Be direct and transparent.
- Set boundaries.
- Practice saying no.
- Use "I" statements.
- Make eye contact.
- Embrace conflict
- Use body language.
- Practice
Summing up
Being assertive and being nice aren't at odds. Assertiveness enables friendly people to showcase their talent and prevents them from becoming angry or resentful afterwards.
Learn to say ‘no’ with a smile. Tell what you like about others and don’t lie to yourself. Remember the quote that ‘You are the creator and destroyer of your life’.
FAQs
1) How to be assertive?
Some tips that can help be assertive include practicing, using “I” statements, focusing on particular behavior rather than making it personal, saying “no” cushioned with a compliment, having one consistent message, not being apologetic or self-effacing, looking confident, and speaking calmly. Expressing opinions is one of the assertiveness examples.
2) How is assertiveness different from aggression?
Assertiveness is a method of communicating that's confident and respectful, while aggression refers to a method of communicating that's assaulting and can hurt others.
3) What are the assertiveness techniques?
Some of the assertive techniques include
- Using “I” statements
- Saying no
- Make sure your emotions are in check.
- Using body language
- Internal assertiveness
- Maintaining boundaries
- Listening actively
- Asking feedback from the people
- Choosing communication styles
- Practising empathy
- Making good eye contact
- Maintaining a tone of voice
